(photo source: www.prometsource.com)
I remember going to my first La Leche League meeting. It was quite literally hours after the little plus sign showed up. In barely the time it takes to make dinner, I had jumped into the mothering world with both feet. I was a wee bit excited. But, I remember driving there, all of a sudden worrying that I wasn’t pregnant “enough” for these women to welcome me in. I was timid and quiet at the meeting (quite unlike me!) and was struck deeply with how they interacted, encouraged each other and shared together. They had all found a place to be honest about the challenges they were struggling through. And they quickly welcomed me in.
I found my tribe.
I remember our first months in our new home and new church. We moved to a place where we didn’t know a soul and were quickly embraced into the community of friends that we now call family. Sunday lunch has never been so fun. It is a community where we let our hair down, let our “true” selves out including the really ugly parts and eat ridiculously unhealthy food. 🙂 They have become a solid rock for us, the place to rest into who we were really are.
I found my tribe.
As I set my foot on the path towards becoming a lactation consultant, I didn’t have any idea that I would want (or even need) a tribe in this work. Yes, I expected to have colleagues, those with whom I shared professional information and horror stories but I didn’t expect to fall deeply in love with the women I served with. This past weekend, I fell in love. I attended, for the first of what I hope will be many, many times, a conference focused on Lactation Consultants in Private Practice. While I was excited to go (many of my breastfeeding rockstars would be speaking!), I didn’t expect a party! I didn’t expect to connect with these women in a deep, heartfelt way. And I certainly didn’t expect to have a bit of emotional vomit over my recent health issues at a dinner table full of women I had just met…but they created a place that allowed for that kind of honesty.
I found my tribe.
I am wholly and completely convinced that we were not created to “do life” in isolation. One thing that our culture has recently done to moms is to tell them that they should be in constant competition. The “Mommy Wars” are brutal. But, if you can, find that group of people who will cheer you on and support you in your goals. It is well-documented that breastfeeding moms who have community support are more successful at breastfeeding and the Surgeon General’s recent “Call to Action” even lists “Strengthen programs that provide mother-to-mother support” as one of the action steps.
The truth is: Your tribe exists. Find it. You might find it in unexpected places. You might find it with people who look like you but more often, maybe with those that don’t. Find that place in life that simply allows you to settle in deep and breathe. And if you can’t find it, make it. I guarantee that others are looking as well.
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Go find your tribe.
Thank you to my lovely friend, Monique, who inspired this post…
Susan Chappelear says
You are so VERY VERY lucky.
Liz Brooks, fellow LCinPPer says
Nice piece, fellow TribesPerson! I’d re-tweet you if I could
Katy says
Oh so true. Love it. Everyone needs a tribe, it is SO important. So glad you have yours!
Anne says
Beautiful post!